Saying "No"
From Harvard Business Review articles on how to say "No" -
To decline gracefully say:
“Thank you so much for asking me to be part of this committee. I’m really honored, but I’ll need to respectfully decline because I’m at capacity right now. Thank you for your understanding.”
When you’re asked to attend a meeting where your presence is not necessary:
“I saw the meeting invite. I appreciate the notice that it’s happening. Jerry will be representing our team. I know he’ll do a great job and will report back on anything we need to know.”
When someone asks you to do something that isn’t your job, you have every right to say no
“Thanks so much for the invite, but I already have some other commitments.”
Saying no to time commitments that don’t align with your priorities or needs can lead to a small amount of initial discomfort but save you hours of time in the end.
“That’s not my area of expertise. I’m happy to give you Cheryl’s contact info, and I’m sure she would be happy to help you with that question.”
“I think Tim, our intern, can order lunch for tomorrow’s meeting. I’ll forward the request on to him.”
“Typically the meeting organizer pulls the report for the presentation.”
When you’re asked to take on a project that is optional and you already have far more to do than you can get done right now, it’s also time to gracefully decline.
“This sounds like a really interesting initiative. Unfortunately, I’m already maxed out on what I can take on right now. I wouldn’t be able to get to this for a couple of weeks/months. Since this is important to you, it’s probably best to give this to someone who can give it more time and attention.”
If you get asked to do something small by today when in fact the deadline is somewhat arbitrary, counter with an alternate deadline.
“I would love to help you, but my time is already fully booked with commitments to [my boss, clients, etc.] today. I’ll get this back to you by Friday.”
If you are often pinged in the evenings and the weekends, and you have the ability to set boundaries, do.
“Hi, Joe! I just wanted to let you know that I saw I got an email from you. I’ll review your request first thing when I get back in the office.”
If you receive a large project that you do need to do but the initial deadline isn’t reasonable given your other commitments, you can negotiate in a few ways.
“I hear that you would like this by the end of the month. But with the other projects we have going on, it won’t be possible to meet that deadline. I would like to propose a deadline of mid-next month. Does that sound reasonable?”
People can typically take a no more easily when you don’t delay.And communicate with confidence. You don’t need to be overly apologetic. Say what you need to say and then move on. If you’re overly apologetic or wishy-washy, you risk giving your colleague false hope that she can change your mind and further prolonging the conversation. Be firm, but kind.
"I'm going to respectfully pass"
To decline gracefully say:
“Thank you so much for asking me to be part of this committee. I’m really honored, but I’ll need to respectfully decline because I’m at capacity right now. Thank you for your understanding.”
When you’re asked to attend a meeting where your presence is not necessary:
“I saw the meeting invite. I appreciate the notice that it’s happening. Jerry will be representing our team. I know he’ll do a great job and will report back on anything we need to know.”
When someone asks you to do something that isn’t your job, you have every right to say no
“Thanks so much for the invite, but I already have some other commitments.”
Saying no to time commitments that don’t align with your priorities or needs can lead to a small amount of initial discomfort but save you hours of time in the end.
“That’s not my area of expertise. I’m happy to give you Cheryl’s contact info, and I’m sure she would be happy to help you with that question.”
“I think Tim, our intern, can order lunch for tomorrow’s meeting. I’ll forward the request on to him.”
“Typically the meeting organizer pulls the report for the presentation.”
When you’re asked to take on a project that is optional and you already have far more to do than you can get done right now, it’s also time to gracefully decline.
“This sounds like a really interesting initiative. Unfortunately, I’m already maxed out on what I can take on right now. I wouldn’t be able to get to this for a couple of weeks/months. Since this is important to you, it’s probably best to give this to someone who can give it more time and attention.”
If you get asked to do something small by today when in fact the deadline is somewhat arbitrary, counter with an alternate deadline.
“I would love to help you, but my time is already fully booked with commitments to [my boss, clients, etc.] today. I’ll get this back to you by Friday.”
If you are often pinged in the evenings and the weekends, and you have the ability to set boundaries, do.
“Hi, Joe! I just wanted to let you know that I saw I got an email from you. I’ll review your request first thing when I get back in the office.”
If you receive a large project that you do need to do but the initial deadline isn’t reasonable given your other commitments, you can negotiate in a few ways.
“I hear that you would like this by the end of the month. But with the other projects we have going on, it won’t be possible to meet that deadline. I would like to propose a deadline of mid-next month. Does that sound reasonable?”
People can typically take a no more easily when you don’t delay.And communicate with confidence. You don’t need to be overly apologetic. Say what you need to say and then move on. If you’re overly apologetic or wishy-washy, you risk giving your colleague false hope that she can change your mind and further prolonging the conversation. Be firm, but kind.
"I'm going to respectfully pass"
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